5 Empowering Ways to Cultivate Lasting Self-Esteem

Building Self-esteem

Self-esteem is the foundation of our mental and emotional well-being. It impacts our relationships, achievements, and overall happiness. Building and nurturing self-esteem is an ongoing process that requires attention, practice, and self-compassion. In this blog post, we will explore five unique and empowering ways to build self-esteem that can help you develop a stronger sense of self and thrive in all areas of life.

  1. Embrace Self-Compassion:

Self-compassion is the practice of treating yourself with kindness, understanding, and acceptance. It involves acknowledging your imperfections and failures without harsh self-judgment. Cultivating self-compassion allows you to develop a healthy relationship with yourself and counter negative self-talk. Remember to offer yourself the same compassion and empathy you would offer a dear friend in challenging times.

Action Steps:

  • Practice self-talk: Replace self-critical thoughts with self-compassionate and supportive statements.
  • Engage in self-care: Prioritize activities that nourish your mind, body, and soul, such as exercise, meditation, and hobbies.
  • Seek support: Reach out to trusted friends, family, or professionals for guidance and encouragement.


  1. Set Realistic Goals and Celebrate Achievements:

Setting realistic goals and celebrating your accomplishments, big or small, is vital for building self-esteem. When you set achievable goals and actively work towards them, you develop a sense of competence and self-worth. Acknowledging and celebrating your achievements reinforces positive self-perception and motivates you to continue growing.

Action Steps:

  • Identify your values and aspirations: Reflect on your passions and interests to set meaningful goals aligned with your values.
  • Break goals into manageable steps: Divide larger goals into smaller, achievable tasks to maintain motivation and track progress.
  • Celebrate milestones: Acknowledge and reward yourself for reaching milestones, even if they seem minor. Treat yourself to something you enjoy or engage in a meaningful self-affirmation ritual.


  1. Practice Self-Expression:

Self-expression allows you to authentically communicate your thoughts, emotions, and creativity. Engaging in activities that facilitate self-expression can boost self-esteem by fostering a deeper connection with your true self and amplifying your unique voice.

Action Steps:

  • Journaling: Write freely and openly about your experiences, feelings, and dreams. Journaling promotes self-reflection, clarity, and self-awareness.
  • Artistic outlets: Explore various creative outlets, such as painting, singing, dancing, or playing an instrument, to express yourself without fear of judgment.
  • Public speaking or joining a club: Practice articulating your thoughts and opinions in a supportive environment, like a public speaking club or a hobby-based group.


  1. Cultivate Resilience:

Resilience is the ability to bounce back from setbacks, challenges, and failures. Developing resilience is crucial for building self-esteem because it allows you to view difficulties as opportunities for growth and learning, rather than as reflections of personal worth.

Action Steps:

  • Reframe setbacks: Instead of dwelling on failure, view setbacks as valuable lessons and opportunities for personal development.
  • Practice self-reflection: Reflect on your strengths and areas for growth, and focus on continuous improvement rather than perfection.
  • Build a support network: Surround yourself with positive and supportive individuals who encourage you to persevere during challenging times.


  1. Engage in Positive Self-Talk and Affirmations:

The way we talk to ourselves significantly influences our self-esteem. By replacing negative self-talk with positive affirmations, you can shift your mindset and build a more positive self-perception.

Action Steps:

  • Identify negative self-talk patterns: Pay attention to the negative thoughts that arise throughout the day. Challenge and replace them with positive, realistic statements.

Read More

Seven Areas of Post Traumatic Growth Possible After Trauma Integration

Post traumatic growth, Sad woman becomes happy and free. People letting go of fears, sadness, grief and pain concept.

Experiencing trauma can be one of the most difficult and painful experiences a person can go through. But it can also be a source of profound wisdom and growth. Here are some key insights and lessons that people often learn from their experiences of trauma:

1. Resilience: Many people who have survived trauma discover that they possess a remarkable inner strength and resilience. They may find that they are able to endure and overcome challenges that they once thought were insurmountable.

2. Compassion: Surviving trauma can also deepen a person’s capacity for empathy and compassion. Having experienced pain and suffering themselves, they may be more attuned to the struggles of others and more able to offer understanding and support.

3. Gratitude: Trauma can also teach people to appreciate the good things in life more deeply. Having faced the darkness, they may have a newfound appreciation for the light, and a greater sense of gratitude for the blessings in their lives.

4. Perspective: Trauma can also provide a unique perspective on life. It can help people see what is truly important, and let go of the things that are not. It can also give them a deeper understanding of the fragility of life, and a greater sense of urgency to live each day to the fullest.

5. Courage: Surviving trauma often requires great courage, and many people find that their experiences have helped them develop greater bravery and resilience in the face of adversity.

6. Self-awareness: Trauma can also be a catalyst for self-reflection and self-awareness. People who have survived trauma may gain a deeper understanding of themselves, their strengths and weaknesses, and their deepest desires and fears.

7. Healing: Finally, trauma can be a catalyst for profound healing and transformation. People who have experienced trauma may be forced to confront their deepest wounds and work through them in order to heal. This can lead to a greater sense of peace, fulfillment, and purpose in life.

In conclusion, while trauma is undoubtedly a difficult and painful experience, it can also be a source of profound wisdom and growth. Survivors of trauma often discover inner strength, compassion, gratitude, perspective, courage, self-awareness, and healing that they might not have otherwise found. By embracing these insights, survivors can move forward with greater resilience, empathy, and purpose in life.

A trauma therapist can play a vital role in helping someone heal from trauma and achieve post-traumatic growth. By creating a safe and supportive environment, helping to regulate emotions, developing coping strategies, addressing negative beliefs and attitudes, encouraging growth, facilitating somatic therapies, and supporting a trauma-informed lifestyle, a trauma therapist can help a person move forward from trauma with greater resilience, purpose, and fulfillment.


Read More

Difference between a Counsellor and Coach

Difference between a Counsellor and Coach

Counselling & Coaching are two of the most commonly used modalities today to support people who feel they want to improve their life.

People who are looking for improvement usually have one of two reasons for wanting to change:

1. They are unhappy and are mentally or emotionally distressed due to issues they are suffering in an area of their life.
2. They are happy but are wanting to reach goals and improve/develop further in an area of their life. eg relationship, business, sport etc.
Counselling & Coaching have a lot of similarities and both use psychological theories and modalities to support clients through problems to get to where they want to be.
There are some major differences that set them apart.


Counselling is a therapy, it deals with psychological and emotional personal healing and trauma recovery.

Counselling is for people with some level of dysfunction or disorder.

Counselling is a confidential service between the counsellor and the client where they work together to heal the client’s issues.

Counselling can be a short or long term process depending on the client’s needs.

Counselling concentrates on the past and present issues.

Counsellors are Diploma or Degree trained and have practical or clinic hours as part of their training.

Qualified counsellors are registered with a regulated board or professional body which follow strict codes of ethics and conduct and require supervision, training and development.

Counselling cost around $80-$250/hr and most clients use between 1 and 6 sessions. Some may continue weekly or monthly sessions as required.


Coaching is popular for improvement in personal (life), business or sporting areas of life so I will just use “coaching” as a generalised term for all these areas of coaching.

Coaching focuses on performance improvement and personal and professional or business development.

Coaching is for people who are already functioning healthily and want to improve on what they have already developed.

Coaching takes a present and future focus.

Coaching may be between one or more parties where the coach helps the client develop skills and reach goals, parties may include a boss or teacher or sporting coach who is also invested in the clients goals.

Coaching is usually a time-limited process where both parties meet regularly to achieve an outcome.

Coaches can be qualified or unqualified and may or may not be registered and follow a strict code of conduct that requires professional development or supervision. They may have their experience from many different industries or skill areas, such as  leadership, management, counselling or psychology. Many counsellors do coaching but not all coaches are counsellors. There are slowly more peak bodies forming in the coaching industry as it is growing in popularity and hopefully that means there will be stricter codes of conduct and training and supervision requirements for the safety of clients.

Coaching costs vary from hourly sessions to yearly contracts. Some may charge $80-1500+/hr to a year costing $15 000+.

It is obvious that there are  many differences in these professions and commonly they co-exist. They can often cross over each other at times and techniques or skills are shared between them and benefit clients in many ways. Many counsellors become coaches and many coaches have had experience in counselling.

If you have any questions regarding this topic you can contact us via the contact us tab.

Read More